My life is so blessed.

I’ve journeyed far and wide in the last ten years and I’m a better person for it and for that I have no regrets. I’ve learned more than I could ever imagine. I think slowly my heart has changed in the last year or so as I realized my own arrogance is worth about as much as a bag of salt. Wanting desperately to wash away the things I don’t like in myself, craving desperately not only for deeper relationships with people and God but wishing that the two weren’t always on a collosion path all the time. I see a friend of mine whose life is so much like mine that it breaks my heart he’s stuck in addictive coping mechanisms when in reality he’s just a broken hearted man desperately in need of a healing process. Isn’t that what we all need, a healing process?

Earlier this month I was angry, lonely, and just plain out bitter. I saw a potential for getting into a codependent relationship and using this to wipe away my own problems. I tried desperately to sort out my own issues it was painful, it was lonely. I had to let go of hopes and dreams in order to see what was right in front of me. Myself.

Hidden beneath all my own issues I am a good person, with the capability to do good. I am strengthened by the Bible, not organized religion as much. In the bible it’s fairly clear that our legacy is not neccesarily a series of actions but often times one significant one. To approach each day, each interaction, each relationship as though it is the reason I exist is my goal, my passion and my dream. Littered behind me a drove of mistakes, littered in front of me a pathway full of more as well. But contentment and peace drive me onward with the knowledge that I’m blessed with the greatest friends a man could have, and man on a path toward the destiny God intended, and the one I desire.

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One response to “My life is so blessed.

  1. This is beautiful, Baja. 🙂

    It’s so hard when we look at ourselves to see ourselves as others see us. We see our mistakes magnified a thousand times over, and sometimes overlook the best parts of who we are.

    You are a good person, with a really amazing deep soul. You are forgiving of people. You give people many chances when they mess up. You are loyal to your friends. You are brave and adventurous. You’re not afraid to try new things or to be open-minded about new situations. You have a spark of Hope in you that just won’t go out no matter what life throws at you.

    You were specially made to be like this for a reason–there is a specific purpose for your life. Even the things you might consider flaws are there for a reason and will help you in your purpose.

    What a wonderful way to end the year, and an inspiring way to start the new one. I’m so happy for you 🙂

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